Rotimi Amaechi Blazing from Afar
Oga is really very keen on this his ambition o. His PR seems to be the best so far. His air bites are catchy and engaging – I know Tinubu’s weak point, if ADC gives me the ticket, I’ll defeat him. If Tinubu influenced Buhari’s ticket, he should come out and show evidence and much more.
Rotimi has shown tremendous courage in tackling the huge Tinubu headlong. He has ferociously engaged the sabre-toothed Wike and has been left standing with that one running with his tail between his legs. He dared Wike to test his popularity by working without security in Port Harcourt. To date, Wike has not taken the challenge, a challenge that I know for a fact that almost no sane Nigerian will take up with those militants, kidnappers and everything that is in that Port Harcourt.
Anyway, the presidency is not for PR sabre-rattling; it is for heavyweights. Amaechi is a lightweight in the scheme of things, and that is the truth. Most of them are. Remove the office, and all you see is a skinny bag of bones yelping around like he is doing now.
These people have no real weight. Since Amaechi left office, he has lost a lot of political weight, and I suspect that all of this noise is just to regain some level of relevance.
Very few like Peter Obi and even that Atiku still retain their lustre after office, the rest just fizzle away or will be left “mewwwing” like a little lost kitten.
My brother, let’s look for something else to do, abeg, this is kinda distracting us.
Akinwumi Ambode: I Hear You
I heard from my favourite politician, Mr Akinuwmi Ambode, the other day. He has remained one of my last hopes for this our democracy. He called and asked how I was and how the column was doing, and I said it is there o with Editor still complaining about my typos. He laughed and we exchanged some pleasantries, and he dropped.
As I returned to my afang, I wondered why the call. My Oga na very quiet and strategic man. He no dey call except there is something. Then it happened.
A few minutes later, I started seeing rushes online. His people were denying links to the coalition, ADC. Aghhhhhhhhh.
Person wey just commot from lion’s den and enemy want to throw him back again o. Daddy shout o- I am not there o. He not only shouted, but he also quickly reasserted his loyalty.
I no blame am o, who will go through what he went through and willingly throw himself back into the fire.
Mbok, nobody send me o, and I must state very clearly that I speak for nobody but myself, and it is on that platform that I want to say that I don’t think that we belong to the ADC. If there is any plan or even thought of us going that route, I will be the first to shout and say – aghhhhhh, I am not there oooooo. Kai.
Femi Falana: Hello from the Other Side
Let me be very upfront. I am not very happy with the legal luminary. You know he is a great son of Ekiti, and I am doing stuff for the state. I wrote him a letter, and he did not reply.
Then I stumbled on him at the Abuja airport and ran to him, screaming, “I catch you.” He smiled and we hugged.
The man still fine o, come fresh with beautiful silver hair and looks like the kind of daddies these our slay queens are looking for. Any sugar baby that comes near this oga, na parts of the constitution she go hear. Lol.
Anyways, he has been quoted that our current political and public officer holders are anything but.
My people, Alagba Falana was stating nothing more than the obvious – from the top down to the states, through the National Assembly, na real – honest bunch- we park and give office.
Almost everybody has one coma or the other, and integrity has been thrown out of the window.
Any attempt to compare this bunch with the ones during Awolowo’s time, as he was quoted to have done, is a massive insult to Awo and that era. Let me keep quiet here before they come and beat me. Meanwhile, Daddy Falz, I am waiting o, make I come?
Ubi Franklin: Very Unnecessary Attention
This social media titan just courts controversy so much. Everybody attended Davido’s latest wedding – me, I am even wondering how many times they will do this wedding – and only him has come out with controversy.
They say something happened with a watch seller, and as a result, the internet has been at his neck without relent.
He is fighting back and even Davido has come out to defend him, but the attacks seem relentless.
I think he should just go and wash his head in church or look for one great dibia, that is, if Soludo has not driven them all away, to change his fate, because I really don’t understand why so much is always after him and he is just such a good-looking and brilliant chap. Sad.
Olumide Iyanda: A Brilliant Outing
Stupendously exciting media man, Olumide Iyanda organised a very powerful summit the other day at the famous Radisson Blu in Ikeja. It was themed ‘Finance as a catalyst for growth in the creative industry,’ and invited me to come and be on the panel o.
As I was running late, I didn’t take my bath, I just poured perfume and entered the place. Immediately I got there, I lost confidence. Come and see the heavyweights that were in the hall.
Steve Ayorinde, Yemi Shodimu, Mike Dada, Kunle Afolayan, Joke Silva, Udeme Ufot, who was Chairman, and so many entertainment industry bigwigs.
I was now wondering what exactly they wanted from me? As I had no answer, I spent my time working the room and taking pictures like a star-struck teenager.
In the process, I didn’t listen to the keynote speaker, one very brilliant lady who spoke so eloquently.
When they now called me on stage, guess the question the moderator asked?
Mr. Edgar, what did you take out from the keynote address? I look this woman, look audience and ask her which keynote address?
I confessed, I didn’t listen, and the hall went into rapturous laughter.
The session was quality both in attendance and in content, and I must confess that that was world-class.
Sorry guys, as I no listen, I really have nothing to say about the content. If you really want to know what exactly was discussed, reach me and I will send you Olumide’s number so you can ask him. Thank you.
Our Women, Listen
One report I just finished reading suggests a correlation between the rise of cancers, infertility amongst our women, to all these synthetic hairs they are wearing.
My people, I just tire. Today, no woman goes out without one kind of wig and fake hair or the other. The level of insecurity is so much that the huge demand has driven the prices to the sky. You will see a lady from the dense parts of Shomolu putting on a N5million wig.
This thing is driving crime as men are put under pressure to deliver – if I calculate how much me I have spent on wigs in this my life, it’s enough for me to be a landlord in Banana Island.
The thing is also driving prostitution with its attendant health and societal challenges. Because of this hair, prostitution has been spliced and rebranded to cover the nefarious act of selling the body for lucre.
Now cancer has entered the matter, and this is not a joking matter.
The sad thing is that most of them even look far better in their natural combo than they do in these hideous wigs. They will be wearing the thing and looking like caricatures, but they will not hear.
Mbok, can we just have a rethink because of these budding health challenges? I know they will not hear now; it is to be abusing me that you will see now. Na wa.
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