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Loud Whispers with JOSEPH EDGAR – THISDAYLIVE

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Monday Okpebholo’s Unkind Language

I watched the two reports on the Edo State governor’s clear instructions to Peter Obi. In the first, he had said, in very suspect English: “No come Edo. Any time you want to come Edo, come and take permission from me otherwise, anything wey do you, no call me o.” A clear threat.

Then as public odium rose, he attempted a clarification: na advice I dey advice am o, because people died and my police orderly died during election campaign.

My people, only the weak fear Peter Obi. Obi stormed Abeokuta the other day for Obasanjo’s birthday, nobody died. He went to Ikeja GRA to defend his brother who was fighting for land and nobody died. I have seen him in so many states and nobody has died so why are people suddenly “dying” anytime he comes to Edo.

Is it because he wears only black clothes and black shoes? On that, I have mentioned  several times that this his only black attire makes him look cheap o, but he doesn’t listen.

The full antidote to Obi is good governance and allowing the people’s mandate to be upheld. You know the saying of creaking bones where the old woman will be flinching? This seems to be the problem and not Obi.

When the mandate is “kurukere”, any small thing go dey fear you. That is all.

Anyway, I think that the main issue is for “bros” to pull back and recalibrate. The finesse is no longer the issue as we used to think, it is the native intelligence and depth to lead a sophisticated state like Edo without turning into a comedian. Thank you.   

Rotimi Amaechi: A Meaningless Vow

This lord has vowed to stop Tinubu’s second term and how he will do that, me dey wait here to see. In a report filed at the Port Harcourt airport, he was said to have reported that he will do everything within his powers to stop what is looking like an inevitable coasting to victory by the incumbent.

Me, I like his optimism, his bravery and also his courage. But the question I want to ask is how?

Is it with that contraption that they have called ADC that he wants to use to achieve this? A coming together of greying dragons with phallic sensitivities that he wants to leverage? Even a small eunuch knows that that ADC is doomed to fail with great grandfather Atiku sitting there l, not wanting to “gree” and other such titans all angling for the ticket. Meanwhile, the other party members are crying that their party has been hijacked by merchants from “Dubai” and its cohorts.

I wrote a piece last week on why Atiku should just go, and one Osa started abusing my children and threatening me that he will be “worse than Bwala once his appointment” into one thing inside ADC is confirmed. Those are the words of a chicken with venereal disease, so I no bother.

But what bothers me is the insistence of these men of the past blocking the road to true opposition politics especially in these times when we are staring clearly at the road to monarchical hereditary government.

All these coalition builders should just leave the scene and “getat,” so that we can now know how to galvanise true people’s power and attempt a rescue of the captured Nigerian state. These ADC people should spend more time consulting with their cardiologist and erectile dysfunction experts and free up oxygen so that we can do what we need to do. Thank you.

Kemi Badenoch: A Vow to Be Kept

This one just needs prayers o. This one and that Olunloyo girl are in the same boat. They are the ones pulling their father’s private parts in public o. This latest one just shows that Mummy needs serious prayers and pity. That her children cannot have Nigerian citizenship because she is a woman or what was that she said? Kai, if this one becomes British Prime Minister, she can attack Nigeria o.

I do not understand where the bile against her birth and natural country comes from. No matter what she would have gone through, she must realise that millions more have gone through worse. And if she cannot in her powers do the right and responsible thing – which is to use her prominence to fight for those ills that may have just so scarred her – she should just ignore us.

Making Nigeria and Nigerians the platform for her politics confuses me. It’s not like Nigerians have the numbers to either defeat or help her win an election in the UK or Nigerians have the influence to affect any major policy direction in the UK, so I don’t understand the fixation.

Nigerians are mostly very vulnerable in that country, they go through a harrowing experience as economic refugees, you hardly see a Nigerian in the UK smiling, they have been mostly turned into drones who work and work and work and work to earn a decent living. They now cover their humiliations by taking advantage of the unholy exchange rate to come here and do Detty December as a relief from the wahala they face there, only to go back to work and work to pay off the credits they had amassed from the strenuous “enjoyment”.

So, the Nigerian lot in the UK, is not Eldorado and like “our thing dey always be,” we now have such a high profile “representative” that should be our own biblical Esther but instead turns the heat on her own people. Sad.

My advice is for us all to pray very solidly that something should happen o, because if this one becomes Prime Minister pere, all of una in that abroad will suffer o. Kai.

Yusuf Buhari’s Missed Opportunity

As I watched this young man address the Federal Executive Council, something came to my mind. You know I can be mischievous like that- so this was also a first son?

Aghhh, he didn’t attend FEC meetings, he did not attempt to shake the Pope, he did not get involved in these other things that we are seeing now or even stand in front of official delegations to greet international dignitaries.

Which kind first son was this one sef? He did not get the memo. I think he just went and got in a motorcycle accident and since then, went under to nurse his injuries and ego, thereby reducing the office to the level of a local government First Lady’s office.

Thankfully, the present occupier has thrown all of that away and the office now has its pride of place, complete with motorcades, national anthem singing arrivals, coat of arms and a huge retinue of officers with its own cabinet and its own National Assembly.

This Yusuf did a great disservice to the office. In fact, the office has known no such glamour since the time of Mohammed Abacha and Yusuf did everything within his powers to further denigrate it.

This is why I like Nigeria, nothing like that lasts. Today we have a more vibrant office, a charismatic holder and a stronger influence in national “doings.” Yes, this is how the office of the First Son should truly be. Thank you.

Gov Ademola Adeleke Dancing in Circles

This one has backflipped into trouble. Everybody has done their “traitorship” with ease, it came to his turn, he carry big belle, do back flip and backslide and hit roadblock. He did not read the memo of his other colleagues in Delta and Akwa Ibom who moved very easily.  But instead, he carry Cubana Chief Priest and Davido to Aso Rock to plead his case.

What do you expect, one that has a “baby mama” issue in Kenya and the other one with a frog voice to plead your case to be accepted into the greatest political party in Africa since Nelson Mandela’s APC? Na “obo” dem give them. They were not accepted.What could be more humiliating? A party that is very hungry for conscripts especially in a state that has been adjudged the ancestral home of the President and the governor being of another party not being accepted?

So, in shame, they forged a “little bit to the left and a little bit to the right” style, which is, I am still in PDP but will support Asiwaju’s presidential second bid – a classic Wike mantra.

Well, I wish the dancing governor well even as I state that I still really do like him, if for nothing else but for his penchant to break into dance no matter the situation. Well done Baba mi.

Bismark Rewane: A Hair Raising Spectacle

This “eleyi” economist has come out in his jerry curl to proclaim that the Naira is now stable and that the economy has turned the corner. Me, I have always looked at this tele-economist with one eye since I became a failed stockbroker and amateur economist.

Mr Rewane has over the years built a career on stating the obvious in a dignified and elegant manner to the admiration of some Nigerians, me not inclusive. His postulations are always just that – simple and almost pedestrian. No complexity, nothing deeper than what you would see on the pages of any newspaper you carry. But somehow, the man has won some funny kind of respect to the point that he consults for huge corporations and hit the top when he was announced Economic Adviser or something like that to one President, and we all saw what came out of that one.

Mbok, SS 1 student of economics will tell you very clearly that the Naira has not stabilised anything. So, they have done “wuru wuru” to the answer and we are seeing temporary results. Yet he has run quickly to proclaim hallelujah.

Spending about $2billion as reported to defend the Naira cannot be hailed as messianic, even me as CBN governor with my F9 in maths and P7 in economics can do that na. This is like throwing water to a fire – all laymen do that and the fire will calm down small and the next minute it will burst out in uproarious anger and the real professionals will come and tackle it from the source.

This Rewane man hailing a shallow victory just goes to confirm where I have put him in the pantheons of economists. Me, I will win the Nobel Prize in Economics well before him. Where are the fundamentals, where is the boost in productive capacity?

We are on the one hand screaming that the benchmark of oil price used on the budget is not being met and our daily output is about 500,000 barrels less than projected, leading to budget shortfalls and the president needing to rush back to the National Assembly to borrow another $21billion which is about 40% of budget to be able to meet its requirement, and this one is shouting eureka when there is explosion ahead.

Me, I support government borrowing if they are judiciously spent and I support some of the projects that have been reported that the funds will be used for as they will open the economy. But to say we have “stabilised”, na lie. We are very very far from stabilisation. What we are seeing now is a temporary storm that will soon abate by the time the FPI funds used to defend the Naira start flowing elsewhere.

What we need is not chorus boys like Rewane but very serious and in-depth analysts who will work with the CBN – who  I must say have shown strong resolve to fight this thing, well done on the forbearance issue – to wrestle down the monsters of inflation, FX fluctuations amongst others.

Guess what? The solution is not with the CBN but in the real sector and at this point, you scream for Trade and Investments, Solid Minerals, IT and Communications, Petroleum and other such huge engines of real economic growth. We need to diversify the economy now and not rebase. Rebase is wururu to the answer oooo! Someone should pull Rewane’s ears and tell him. Come and beat me.

Usoro Akpabio: Well Done, Calm Down, Start Work

When the appointment of my sister as the new and pioneer head honcho at the newly established South South Development Commission was announced, the whole country gasped in admiration. Usoro has paid her dues. A veteran within the corridors of power, an adept follower of power and a surreal attendant to the welfare of people, her appointment is one round peg in a round hole that the harshest of critics cannot do but celebrate.

During the week, she and her management team received their official mandates from the Secretary to the Federal Government, signposting the blowing of the whistle.

Her job in the South South is clearly marked out as the older NDDC have not really lived up to its expectations as an interventionist platform. Usoro and her team must as a matter of priority move very succinctly towards tackling the many problems in the region.

I remain very confident, and I must say that from feelers across the region, that Usoro with her credentials and firm reputation, is the woman for the job. Well done sis and go for it. God bless you.



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